The Daily Sabs

and right now all i am doing is surfing the webs for new music to play on spotify. i am so in love with music again.

speaking of music and photo booth, here's an old death cab song that i used to love. i bring it up because i can't believe i like a new death cab song.

i have an iced tea problem. no really i do. if it's not iced tea, it's bubbly water.

i also have an i'll throw it out later problem. despite the trash being 1 foot to the right of my desk. mostly because i forget to drink the last 1/4 inch and leave it on my desk for later.

this means that on most days, my desk is littered with a smattering of beverages. today the sugar dev crew headed out for coffee and ethan took one look at my desk and asked if i needed anything, like perhaps more plastic cups. i told him why yes i'm sure i could use some more empty plastic cups (to go with the three on my desk and the two bottles). har har good laugh had at my expense.

but then, to my surprise, when they came back from the coffee run, he had indeed brought a new plastic cup! this one was blue and reusable just like my red one. now i can choose between the mean reds or the blues.

the desk/cup photo which actually has another cup right off frame, and a wine glass too.

today was my four year sugar-versary. i can't believe it's been four years. for the record, this is the longest i've ever worked anywhere. it's sort of mind-boggling when i think about it. it doesn't feel like four years and it's sort of wild to think i've been here this long. what's also wild is the number of desks i've sat at in that period of time. today i moved again (back in the nerd pen), i honestly believe this is the 10th spot in this office alone, add the other two offices and that's a dozen seats in four years. that amount of moving around is kind of ridiculous.

you know what else is ridiculous? little v! yesterday was her birthday and she didn't tell a soul. so naturally we had to make up for it today with cupcakes. happy birthday little v! you won't be so sneaky next year!

i don't remember the last time i had an eye exam. although i do remember that they told me my eyes were 20/20 perfect. that is good news, except the time before that it was some other set of numbers that were above perfect. translation, they were deteriorating. and well, it's probably been 5 years since I've had an exam, so who knows what's happened since then.

i bring this up now because lately, my eyes have been killing me. absolutely killing me. it doesn't really help that i sit in front of the computer about 18 hours a day, and that the lighting in our house is really dim (not to mention randomly peachy colored - i blame the ikea bulbs). and that it's been this routine for the last four years.

i used to really want glasses (no really, i wanted them so badly i had a fake pair in college), but now i think the idea sucks.

ps. i got a safety deposit box today. it was sort of random. i was there for other stuff and then the next thing i knew, i was getting a box. i wanted to take a pic in the vault, but they seemed to frown on that idea.

yesterday, randall's aunt shared a good story about him. apparently when he was around 2 years old, he used to say "don't looka me, don't talka me!" - this, my pals, says an awful lot about the man i married. he definitely hates being the center of attention and he doesn't like talking to people. as i mentioned yesterday our families are pretty opposite, and if you didn't know it already, so are randall and i. this sentence pretty much sums it up. while he was running around telling folks to not looka him or talka him, i was telling people to looka me, talka me.

except not today. today was a don't looka me, don't talka me.

i got approximately zero minutes of sleep last night, unless you count that teeny bit of just about to fall asleep until something wakes you up time (thanks stupid computer screen for turning on). part of the non-sleep is due to the fact that i napped yesterday and sort of ruined my schedule, but mostly it's that my brain wouldn't shut up. once i put the computer back to sleep, i myself tried to sleep but couldn't. i had a million and one things running through my mind (was the timer going to work, did i answer that email, did i like the end of the hurt locker, are we really thinking about buying a house, how come i don't know how to do word transitions on powerpoint, was i supposed to finish writing all that marketing info, how am i going to play that Q on words with friends) and decided to get up.

i figured, i might as well get some of those things done while i was wide awake, and the next thing i knew it was 4:30. being up that late was beyond stupid, so i crawled back into bed and tried to sleep. that lasted for another 30 minutes, and so i got up to answer non-urgent email. i figured that would surely bore me to sleep, but the next thing i knew, it was 5:45 and i was doing work firedrills. the crisis was averted (sorry for early morning phone calls and emails folks), but now it's 7:30 and far too late (um, early?) to go to bed.

and if you find me under my desk later, just leave me there. thanks.

ps. everytime i mention that i'm up late or early and not getting enough sleep, all my parent friends comment about hey if i had kids, this would be my everyday. i have to say, if you're trying to get me to join your club, you should really work harder on your messaging.

pps. if you haven't already heard, we're giving away an iPad just for blogging three times. so if you haven't already taken OnSugar for a spin, I highly recommend you do.

lately i've been breaking out like crazy. maybe it's the greasy pork chops or the fact that i now cook all vegetables in my new favorite habenero olive oil (lots of it). either way my face needed a breather. so today i didn't wear any makeup. this was fine for the first few fresh faced hours, but now that it's past 7 and i'm oddly still in the office, it's not looking so good. i squished my eyes up so you couldn't tell. but that's where all the madness is, look closely and you can see those hidden pandas and blemishes hidden in creases. also, while i'm vainly talking about my face, when did it get so goddamned wide? and how do i make it stop? how do i weigh exactly the same as i did 3 years ago but my face seems 5 times as round?

okay, going to pull my hair out if i don't leave here. nite.

really, it's been that sort of a day. hopefully those kids at 826 don't break me completely! bay-farer 31 begins in 25 minutes! ciao!

rule number one, don't cry at work (especially if it's work related, but keep tears away even if it's not work related). rule number two, don't break rule number one.

there are some other personal work rules after that one, but this one my number one. crying at work is for suckers. don't cry at work. it's not very becoming and it makes you look weak. (there are a few exceptions, say a death of a loved one, but they are rare cases).

outside of work, cry all you want. i don't care. bawl in your beer or your cereal. i do. we all do. those that don't are heartless. people who say they never cry weird me out. that's not human.

i feel pretty strongly about these things. go ahead and cry in public, just not at work, or right outside of work either. the workplace is weird. it's best to leave your tears on the commute.

so as you can imagine, it sort of took me by surprise when i nearly lost it today. eyes closed deep breath practically meditating internal cursing and mentally throwing things at a wall was all i could to do control it.

is everyone's family so full of dramz?